Perhaps it's because we aren't capable enough. We lack the natural ability to do things.
Or, the one I hear the most often… “I just have bad luck.”
While these are all very popular things to blame our lack of progress on, the problem runs much deeper. Truly, the biggest reason we don't achieve our dreams is because we are afraid of failing.
We are raised to believe that failure is bad and those who fail are doing something wrong. It is better to not even try, than to risk making a fool of yourself.
Well, I am here to tell you that the complete opposite is true – those who fail are the only ones doing things right. Because they are trying to accomplish their goals.
If you spend your entire life worrying about tripping and falling on your face, then you will never get your Expertpreneur® business where you want it to be. You will stay stuck in one place, dreaming about a brighter future, never actually taking steps to get there.
As Wayne Gretzky, who played professional hockey in my home town in Edmonton, Alberta, once said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.”
So, today I'm going to show you the sheer power of embracing failure, and how it will help you reach your goals in your life and in your business.
You'll discover the true path to success, which may not go the way you thought…
Regular exercises the most successful people in the world employ every day…
And the other side of the “failure” coin that is equally threatening to our dreams…
The Roadmap to Success
Stories that begin with an extreme struggle, a sudden revelation that changed everything, and then a rise to success. A theme many of us can relate to.
When people tell these stories, they simplify them in a way to suggest that everything happened in a straight line. That once they “decided to change their lives” they did.
Think about reality shows where “unknown” talent is discovered and then rises to stardom, seemingly overnight. They are designed to appeal to our dreams of achieving fame and fortune without a lot of effort.
Well, I'm here to tell you that success does not come this way. Not realistically. Despite how desperately media and our society will have you believe.
Frankly, the only way to achieve your dreams is to put yourself out there. Try, and fail, over and over again.
Success comes in more of a zig-zag pattern than a straight line. When you test out an idea, it might not work. So you try something else. Whenever you hit a sticking point you zig, then you zag. And vice versa.
Failure improves your chances of success. The most famous example of this is Thomas Edison and the light bulb. He failed with 10,000 experiments before coming up with a solution. And how did he look at it? “I just found 10,000 ways that don't work, I’m one step closer to finding the solution.”
Can you imagine trying and failing at something 10,000 times? Most people won't try even once. Yet, because he had the right attitude, and saw failures as steps forward, we now have electric lighting.
Look to Abe Lincoln. The first time he ran for office, he came in 8th out of 13 people. Instead of giving up, he went on to study law, and ran again during the next election. He tried a new approach to his campaign – fewer bold promises and more face-to-face interactions – and won. Eventually, he became president. One of the greatest United States presidents ever.
The point is, if you have a goal and you set out to accomplish it, you will find a way to get there. Yes, you will probably fail along the way. And no, it won't be a simple straight line from A to B.
Just by taking the leap and embracing the results with an open mind and heart, you will get further in life. And you will be so much happier for it.
The Mantra for Perseverance
Ever since The Secret came out, there has been a lot of discussion about the laws of attraction, and whether they truly work. Can you truly become successful just by believing it will come?
Well, yes and no…
The Secret focuses on changing your mindset to achieve your dreams. If you accept the laws of abundance, show gratitude for what you have in life, and keep positive about your dreams and potential, you will find success.
These ideas have been around for a long time. If you look to Maxwell Maltz's Psycho-Cybernetics, published in the 60's, he emphasizes the idea that you must have an accurate and positive view of yourself before setting goals. Visualize your success, and you will achieve it.
Even going 100 years back to 1910, Wallace Wattles explains in depth the virtues of positive thinking and doing, in The Science of Getting Rich.
Long story short, every successful person you look up to thinks this way. They wake up every morning and remind themselves they can achieve their dreams. They strive to keep positive no matter what obstacles they face.
Some people use a “dream board” they look at every day. Something that displays everything they want in life. To keep them motivated throughout the day.
Other people have a collection of inspirational quotes to read through. They most likely say them out loud to put them in a good frame of mind.
They also take time to reflect on everything in their life that is good. A roof over their heads, friends and family who care for them, their health… All things we tend to take for granted.
Now, everything I'm talking about may either sound like common sense, or utter nonsense to you… but the fact of the matter is, this stuff works.
Part of the challenge we face in trying to achieve our dreams is not believing we are capable. Success is only for a privileged few. Those born under a lucky star.
If you truly believe you can't do something, then you are absolutely right. However, if you do believe you can do something, then you are absolutely right. It's all about what you think and believe.
Also, luck isn't a random event that only befalls a few people. The definition of luck is preparation meeting opportunity. And that is the important point The Secret leaves out.
In addition to practicing all of the powerful mental exercises I've mentioned, you must take actual steps toward achieving your goals. Inaction will lead you nowhere. You cannot will success with your mind alone. You have to put yourself out there and try things out.
What if You DO Succeed?
Marianne Williamson wrote a poem addressing this very topic. She said, “our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”
It's an interesting concept, right? In addition to fighting our fear of failing at something, we are also combating the fear of infinite possibility. What will our lives be like if we really do achieve our dreams?
This can be especially scary as an Expertpreneur®, because we want to make a career out of helping others. And if we truly build our business to a large scale, and many people start relying on us for advice, how will we live up to their expectations?
This brings about a lot of the same symptoms as fearing failure. In fact, they go hand-in-hand. Have you ever stopped working on a project because you're worried about what might happen if it led to recognition? Are you worried about how your life might change? Will people expect more from you and judge you more harshly?
As Voltaire originally said, but was made famous by the Spiderman comics, “with great power comes great responsibility.”
You have the power to do anything you want. However, accepting that means a life of striving to achieve what you want and overcoming obstacles. It requires effort, something that many people don't want to bother with. You have to embrace change.
I want you to understand that your fears are perfectly valid. It's okay to be concerned about how things might change if you become successful.
However, I also want you to understand that having success is so much better than not having success. That may sound silly, but it's true. The feeling you get from achieving a goal you've been fighting for is unparalleled.
Taking Down Obstacles One By One
You have complete control of your destiny. Yes, you will come across roadblocks. Yes, you will stumble and fall.
However, if you keep getting up and trying new things you will achieve your dreams. And it will be everything you hoped and dreamed it would be.
A good exercise is to write down all of your hopes, dreams, fears and frustrations on a piece of paper. Everything that comes to mind. Just like how you would research your prospects.
Also, be sure to write down what you do have in your life – what you are grateful for.
Address those fears head on. Find out the root, and work to understand what overcoming them will mean for your life. Chances are the benefit is far greater than avoiding whatever scary thing it is.
Turn everything around into goals, and put those up on your wall. Look at them every day. Remind yourself why you are on this journey to becoming a successful Expertpreneur®.
You will feel emboldened by looking at this every day. You'll face each task with confidence, and your dreams will become a reality.